This week was pretty much all about survival mode for me. I went on a premature running spree over the holidays- after a TWO year hiatus- and now find myself limping around with a tweaked knee. Just in time for my mama to head back home to California and leave me with not too much extra help. So I’ve been laying low, icing and elevating; and overall just trying to get back to normal so I can play with girls the way they deserve.

I think one of the questions I’m most commonly asked is what advice I would give to those facing infertility.

I discuss my own journey with infertility, as well as my advice, and what NOT to say here; but this only gives one side of the story- my perspective, as a woman trying to conceive.

My journey with infertility began in January of 2014.

Phil and I got married in October of 2013; but knowing my history with PCOS, I decided to stop taking the BCP the summer before we tied the knot. I had known for most of my adult life that it would take some time and help to start a family, so I figured I would roll the dice and see what happened.

So, here we are again.

I promised I'd be more open this time around, so here it is:

This past Monday I found myself in that familiar waiting room; my first appointment back in a while. The first one since I mustered up the strength I needed to try to complete our family a few months ago; only to quickly psych myself out again.

If you follow along here, you know that infertility is something I struggled with before finally conceiving our daughter through IVF in 2014. It's a topic that is such a large part of my story, and continues to be something we grapple with as we strive to complete our family. After much soul-searching, we took the leap to try for another baby last fall. 

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People said a lot of strange things to me during that year struggling to conceive; most of which I chalked up to the the fact that most people just didn't know what to say. I've been that person, too, at times- one really wanting to comfort or encourage, but at a loss as to how to do so.

In that year most people cheered us on; many asked questions; others said nothing at all. But all of them cried happy tears when they heard our good news. So I believe all of it came from a good place.

My relationship with infertility is a tumultuous one.

Difficult as my road to motherhood was, in the scheme of things it was relatively short. Six months of trying on our own, seven months of IUIs and success after one round of IVF.

Throughout this struggle to conceive, I, sadly, encountered people that dismissed my struggles because of this brevity- comparing my "short" journey to their own, unfortunately, longer ones.

But I don't believe in ranking people's challenges- particularly when it comes to creating a family. Whether you struggle with infertility for seven months or seven years is irrelevant in my mind- it is an impossible pain to want to create a life and, for whatever reason, struggle to do so.

But boy, the fight is so worth it.